Hello Faith...

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Stand firm in your faith.

But how can I stand strong when I feel like I’m drowning in this world’s temptations, and stress, and yes, 

I’ve given in before.

I’ve gone to that “other side” - completely ignoring the Lord.

You think I was worried about who He is or what He could do?

All I was worried about was goin out, partyin, and bein with ol dude.

BUT GOD.

He came in and snatched my heart up so quick I literally didn’t know what happened.

All i could hear was “come with me and be forever happy”

happy?

Being with You could make me

happy?

Well then, by all means let’s talk for a second and let me get to know you again.

Lemme try to find my happieness and get to that place

Where I feel like I’m strong in my faith and to a place where I won’t fall.

…

But how can I do that? 

How do I give You my all?

Show me what it means to be rooted in Your love.

To give You first priority, placing nothing else above You and the grace that You show and the love that You give…

But the way my “faith” goes it seems like

I have a good couple days then I get dragged down by sin..

My spirit gets torn up and I start down a backspin…

slipping and sliding and losing my balance.

Not praying or reading the Word, because “that’s not the answer”

“All I gotta do is stop messin with those people, do my own thing.

Don’t worry bout nobody else and stay in my own lane”

Right?

But that’s not what You’re saying is best.

The Word says to live only for God and not second guess.

So if giving my life to God means it’s not just about “myself and i” anymore

then things have switched up a bit.

…

So now that I’m stronger, and not tryna quit..

I’ll place God first, give him rule over my decisions.

So when the devil tries cut me up, and tries to make an incision - it won’t work.No longer dying to my flesh, I’m free from those chains..

God has given me new life so I’m praising His name.

THANK YOU GOD for breath, life and a sound mind.

THANK YOU GOD for your grace and letting my old life stay behind..

THANK YOU for forgiving me and protecting me and saving me

THANK YOU for the clothes on my back and the food I get to eat.

THANK YOU GOD for your love because better than life is its quality.

THANK YOU for giving me the strength to live for you without apology.

girlwithgod:

Holy, holy holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come. With all creation I sing: Praise to the King of Kings! You are my everything, and I will adore you!

was able to learn this song in 3 other languages this past week at Urbana #u12

(Source: thepaulzone)

Recently, I’ve really been unsure in what God’s voice sounds like and in what ways he has been speaking to me. I have been spending the last few months unsure, lost and discouraged.

These last 3 days have been EVERYTHING I needed. i have slowly but surely been discovering the ways God has spoken to me in the past and how he is currently speaking… I was even more put back with something profound that the Hotel engineer said to me while trying to get my door unlocked.

Backstory :) — I got locked out of my room. keys weren’t working. went down to the front desk twice keys still weren’t working. security came up & it still didn’t work so he called the engineer. “Something must be wrong with the door not the keys”

Security left and the engineer came back. He asked did security use his key to open the door. yeah, he did. so then the engineer told me something that really struck a chord.

“Security has an emergency key. It opens every door in this building. It’s meant to be an emergency key because its able to open doors even when the deadbolt is on. If the light is blinking green it’ll open, but even if the light is flashing red as though its not working, the key will still open the door. If nothing lit up on the lock, still that key will open the door”

Isn’t it AMAZING that we have a God who is willing to be the emergency key that opens the doors to our hearts & spirits?
EVEN when nothing lights up & we aren’t being responsive to Him…. the door will still open.
EVEN when our light is blinking red as though His key is not meant for that particular door, all he has to do is push the handle and the door WILL open.
and EVEN in situations where other keys that we thought were correct did not work, God’s emergency key will make the light blink green and OPEN THE DOOR.

I let that engineer speak into my life in a way tht I don’t even think he was aware of. but I am so grateful that he did. I’m so grateful that MY key didnt work and that I was forced to use the emergency key!
Thank you God for being merciful and unlocking our hearts even in our unresponsive moments, and in those moments where we do not think that the key is working & we’re blinking red. thank you for being that emergency key!!

Tonight I had a long (nearly 5 hour) talk with my friends from my Christian ministry at school.. it was EXHAUSTING but it was truly an anointed experience because we all were able to share with each other and understand how each of our stories intersected with each other.

I cried. I completely broke down. not because I was sad or even overjoyed. I was just tired.

I’m really tired of always being sad and angry. I’m tired of resenting my family and blaming myself for broken relationships. I’m tired of trying so hard to hear God and how he is speaking to me and not knowing what I’m listening to…

when I finally shared a piece of my testimony, I added that I wanted to get back to my happy part of life, before the anger and resentment.. that I just wanted to not be so tired anymore. Emily, a girl I’d never met before, responded to my statement about going back by saying that God doesn’t want me to move backwards. He wants me to be made new with him, nd find a NEW sense of peace and happiness than the one “before”

After that, all I heard was a loop of Israel Houghton’s “Moving Forward”…

“You make all things new, yes you make all things new, and I will follow you forward” — JUST this part. on a loop. for about 5 minutes.

I walked away from the group and went to a corner and fell to the ground.
“You make all things new, yes you make all things new, and I will follow you forward”
I made a resolution about my walk with God in that moment. I decided that my relationship with him would no longer be defined by the ways I had interacted with him in the past. I am throwing those pieces of my life away.. I am giving them up as parts of me so that I can make room for the NEWness that is going to be as I MOVE FORWARD.
it is a process, I’m sure. and I’m not saying that tomorrow I’m going to wake up and be a completely different person than I am right now. but I am saying that I am ready to be a completely different person. I’m ready to give myself, and surrender my life so that God can do what he needs to in my life. I’m ready for that. completely.

So I think I can feel confident in asserting that I have completed what I’m calling “step one” in a lifelong process. The step where I decide that my life is no longer my own but one that is God’s and that is guided by Jesus’ mission of discipleship and obedience.

Praise God for anointing. Praise God for fellowship and community. Praise God for vulnerability and compassion and love. Praise Him for keeping me in his presence and for making known to me his importance in my life. Praise God.